A Different Look at Handling Adversity
adversity
: a state or instance of serious or continued difficulty or misfortune.
Merriam-Webster Dictionary
Overcoming adversity…
We are headed into the third month of 2023. What an interesting start this year has gotten itself off to. I was praying for reprieve and a refreshing in this new year, but God has had other plans. Not necessarily a bad thing, but definitely different than the expectations I had for myself and my family. So, the question becomes, how I will handle this unexpected reality.
How will I handle adversity?
How do you handle adversity?
I can sum it up for you and myself with three possible ways to tackle adversity:
Retreat, React, or Reset.
Let's explore…
Let me start by saying this is not the best option in my opinion. However, if I'm being honest, the thought of retreating has crossed my mind more often than I’d like to admit. From my perspective, retreating looks something like this: closing in on myself; leaning too much on my own understanding (or lack thereof); withdrawing from friends and family; drawing uninformed conclusions; looking through the Internet for answers (whether accurate or not); and possibly just feeling sorry for myself and/or my situation. Do any of those activities sound familiar to you? I’ve been there and chosen some of those options in the past and found that they did not serve me well. I should note that this type of retreat is not to be confused with retreating in the form of resting. Rest is very important. But after resting, we still get up and take action. With that being said, what else can we do?
Well, another possible option would be to react. To me, reacting would maybe include jumping to conclusions; resigning to fail; blaming and questioning; or just giving into an overall sense of pessimism. And while all those feelings are real and valid, the problem or issue at hand still has not been solved. How do I know this? Because reacting has often been one of my go-to responses. But reasonably, I’d much rather be proactive, when possible, rather than reactive due to my past experiences not having the outcomes I desired. Sometimes when our emotions run too hot and too high, unproductive and irreversible reactions can occur. And when that happens, an already unpleasant situation can be made worse, and the cycle has the possibility of starting all over again. That brings me to what I consider to be the best option for handling adversity.
My final and chosen option would be to reset. Based on my experience, this is the best option of the three. However, resetting can still be a struggle, seems like we’ve had to do so much of it in the past three years! I mean how much resetting can one individual be expected to really do?! But seriously, we have to do what’s necessary to push forward.
Figuring out the who, what, when, and where are all important factors in resetting… Who we can count on to encourage, support, and hold us accountable during this process. What actions we need to take to come out victoriously on the other side of the adversity. When we can expect to reach the goals we’ve set for ourselves. Where we anticipate this process to take us. These four considerations are of the utmost importance in resetting our mindset, habits, and even responses to certain situations.