Guide to Thriving throughout the Holiday Season
Remember, you’re not alone in the stress and anxiety you may feel during this season. But also remember, you don’t have to stay in that space. Find ways to do better, to feel better. Take it day by day. Hopefully, I’ve shared something here that may help.
There’s a lot on my mind that I’ve wanted to share with you… where do I begin?! I think this actually may have started more as a journal entry…. maybe a plan of action… but once I looked back over what I’d transcribed, I realized it was something that I HAD to share with you all. Take what you need and share if it may be helpful someone else.
A lot can happen by December 31… keep moving forward!
Not only can a lot happen before this year comes to an end, but you may have already experienced what could be considered “a lot” in 2024! That’s what I’m feeling… 2024 has brought some of the best times celebrating and traveling with my family, even my business is thriving and growing. On the other hand, this year has also been one of the most difficult years of my life experiencing loss, illness, and life changes. In the midst of all those highs and lows, one thing remains constant… life goes on. Ugh! I’ve never really been a fan of that saying but it is very true. As long as God gives us breath, we will continue to experience our tomorrows… each with their own ups and downs.
With this particular blog, I hope to share tips that will, at minimum, get us through the remainder of the year and on into the new year. Shoot, I imagine these concepts could actually serve as a guidepost even beyond this season. I almost wanted to title it “Christmas Survival Guide”, but I don’t want to just survive. I want to THRIVE!
With that being said, let’s get into it!
Grieve! Whatever it may be and whenever necessary
Grief is complex. At the base level, it’s the experience of dealing with a loss. That loss doesn’t only have to be a death (even though that is what we most often consider). One may grieve the loss of a home, a job, health, or a marriage. And that’s just naming a few! Whatever you may be grieving in this season, allow yourself to be open with what you’re feeling. Hopefully, you have a safe place or person to share your thoughts… whether it be God, a bestie, or a therapist. Don’t subscribe to anyone else’s input on a timeframe for grief, as there is no such thing. All of us are unique, as are our situations. I just ask that you don’t sit too long in it without some sort of help. I know from experience that it can affect us in a multitude of ways: physical, mental, behavioral, relational, and emotional! Find a way to move forward at your own best pace… not because someone tells you to, but because you deserve to express your thoughts and move forward in a healthy manner.
Pray & meditate!
Stay focused on the good that can be found in this season. My favorite ways of doing this are through prayer and meditation. Sometimes, I’m able to pray an elaborate and eloquent prayer to God. Other times, the best I’m able to do is utter the name, “Jesus”. Both, and everything in between, can get the job done. Just pray and don’t forget to praise! While there is truly plenty to worry about in our world, we can all find at least one reason to praise… think: your kids, waking up this morning, your paycheck, or food on the table.
For me, meditation allows me time to SLOW DOWN and focus for a few minutes. Literally, I will sometimes do a 3-minute guided meditation to simply remove myself from a stressful or unfocused moment of time. However, it doesn’t just have to be done during tough times; it could also become a regular habit that you incorporate into your daily life to find and maintain peace and calm. My favorite meditations included guided breathing exercises. It may sound odd, needing to have someone else walk me through breathing, something we do every day. But you’d be surprised by how much better we can feel by slowing down our breathing and focusing on deep breaths. It can be lifechanging in those moments. There are tons of resources to available, whether through an app on your phone or even online.
Move your body!
Yes, I understand how busy you may be during this time of the year. I’m not saying you have the hit the gym for two hours every day or go to Zumba every day (even though I’d love you to come to my Zumba classes lol). A simple walk through your neighborhood, time in your garden, dancing to the radio, and even a yoga session are beautiful forms of exercise.
As a Personal Trainer and Group Fitness Instructor, this does happen to be a favorite focus of mine to share about. According to the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, Office of Disease Prevention and Health Promotion (the organization that sets the recommendation for how much physical activity we need to be healthy), “adults should do at least 150 minutes to 300 minutes a week of moderate-intensity, or 75 minutes to 150 minutes a week of vigorous-intensity aerobic physical activity, or an equivalent combination of moderate- and vigorous-intensity aerobic activity. Preferably, aerobic activity should be spread throughout the week. Adults should also do muscle-strengthening activities of moderate or greater intensity and that involve all major muscle groups on 2 or more days a week, as these activities provide additional health benefits”.
That a lot, right? How do you do that? How can you meet those requirements? Just start by doing physical activities that you enjoy and explore new ways to incorporate physical activity into each day. And remember, while I would love to have you as my own client, you do not have to seek out a gym, personal trainer, or group fitness classes to get your exercise. Make a commitment to just start moving or move more! Keeping your focus on physical activity will not only benefit your health, but it can also give you a great release from your daily routine and even all of the busy-ness and (often) stress we can face during this time of the year.
Socialize! With whom you wish & at your own pace
This time of the year, with all of its potential for glorious festivities and celebrations can be very good for the heart, mind, and soul; however, it can be overwhelming! I think this is one of the first years in a really long time that I have felt overwhelmed. It’s always been my favorite time of the year, but this year has been a lot. I’ve done most of my usual activities, but for the remainder of the year and into the next, I’m making adjustments. Illness, grief, and exhaustion have been big factors in that decision.
With that being said, I know how important is to still have my people near me. Whether that be in-person, via calls, via texts, via Facetime…. The love and care that my immediate family provides me is irreplaceable, I need it. I also need certain family & friends, along with their support and input in my life. According to the Mayo Clinic, the proper relationships can truly enrich our lives and here’s a few ways they do it:
Increase your sense of belonging and purpose
Boost your happiness and reduce your stress
Improve your self-confidence and self-worth
Help you cope with traumas, such as divorce, serious illness, job loss, or the death of a loved one
Encourage you to change or avoid unhealthy lifestyle habits, such as excessive drinking or lack of exercise
Gift yourself!
Finally, take care of yourself! As you’re shopping for others and wrapping their gifts, don’t forget yourself. With as much excitement and joy that comes along with this season, there is also the potential for stress and anxiety. Make sure to take the time to do what you need to for yourself.
I’m won’t go into any detailed explanations here, because I know you’ve heard it all before. I’m just going to set out a few phrases that I hope give you the permission (or a reminder) you need to practice self-care.
Take a nap!
Just say no!
Watch that holiday movie! (I know, I know…. we already know the plot: big-city corporate daughter returns home to help run the family business. She runs into a few obstacles that only her former high school boyfriend can assist with thanks to his local business. They reconnect, fall in love, and live happily ever after. Still, watch the movie!)
Drink your water!
Bake the dessert! (and eat some!)
Remember, you’re not alone in any stress and anxiety that may creep up during this season. But also remember, you don’t have to stay in that space. Find ways to do better, to feel better. Take it day by day. Hopefully, I’ve shared something here that may help. My prayer for us all is that we remain as hopeful as possible about our futures and THRIVE right where we are as we move forward.
Increase versus Deprivation
“: to grow or develop successfully : to flourish or succeed
: to do well in a situation in which you are given (a particular type of treatment)”
— Britannica Dictionary definition of THRIVE
What do I mean by “increase versus deprivation”?
Last year around the holidays, after voicing a desire to challenge myself to eliminate and/or limit a particular habit for the remainder of the year, a close friend of mine issued a warning. She cautioned that during that season of the year (a season often busy and overwhelming with travel, family, different feelings & emotions, and even bit of stress), it was imperative to be mindful of all aspects of our wellness.
She shared that while it does make sense to want to be in control of something during that time, it may be a better idea to focus on adding something I can control. She gave suggestions like meditation, prayer time, or self-care time.
What is truly beneficial about those instructions is that they don’t only apply to the holiday season, but to the daily lessons and learnings we face during our lives. Fast forward to now navigating life without my mom, after having lost my dad almost eight years ago. There’s an immeasurable feeling of loss, while also feeling lost in the midst of my new reality.
Without realization by either of us, that same friend gave me that same advice during a lunch a couple of weeks after mom died. I (again) shared my focus on eliminating certain behaviors from my life, and she issued the same warning….
How does the application of this advice change from one season to another?
Well, very carefully. Ha! But seriously though.
What I took from her advice can be summed up, as such:
Do what you have to do to survive, when necessary. Use moderation and be intentional about the choices you make, but the goal in that moment is to just survive. Once the situation has passed, use your resources and proper mindset to move towards thriving.
“: to grow or develop successfully : to flourish or succeed
: to do well in a situation in which you are given (a particular type of treatment)”
5 easy(-ish) ways to THRIVE (focus on increase) when the time is right:
Practice gratitude
Acknowledge the good things and good people in your life. Find ways to express that gratitude daily in the following possible ways: writing in a journal, praying, meditating, sharing your testimony publicly or privately… just to name a few.
Find ways to express that gratitude daily in the following possible ways: writing in a journal, praying, meditating, sharing your testimony publicly or privately… just to name a few.
Set clear boundaries and expectations for yourself and others in your life
Establish expectations for yourself and hold tight to them. What do you plan to accomplish? How do you plan to make it happen? What assistance might you need? What timelines are you setting for yourself?
Identify what your boundaries are and hold tight to them. If something (whether a situation or a person or a particular thing) makes you feel uncomfortable, limit your exposure to it/them. You can make known the reason, but you absolutely do not have to.
Be mindful of your own thoughts
Be forward-thinking. Don’t get stuck in the past… let go of its negativity, your worries, or your self-perceived failures.
Pay attention to your feelings. Focus on filtering out that negativity and bolstering that positivity. It’s good for us!
Nourish yourself properly - inside and out
Maintain healthy eating habits. Choose smart snacks. Stay hydrated. Move your body. Moisturize your skin.
Prioritize getting proper sleep
This is one of the best ways that you can take care of yourself. Begin by establishing a bedtime routine. Create the appropriate ambience in the room (relaxing and desired temperature), minimize work/household tasks, and shut down electronics! Reading or light stretching are examples of activities you can engage in if you still feel a bit restless.
January WELLNESS Bucket List
…without a plan or some intentional thought, our fresh starts and ideas may lose their luster. Well, that’s where I step in…
2024 has arrived… an opportunity to begin anew!
A new year sometimes means a fresh start. A fresh start sometimes signifies beginning something new. However, without a plan or some intentional thought, our fresh starts and ideas may lose their luster. Well, that’s where I step in and hope to help by offering a few (thirty, to be exact!) different ideas for you to add to your bucket list.
What’s a bucket list? Ha! Fair question. It may be a concept or a phrase that’s new for you. Plainly stated, a bucket list is a group of items, ideas, or experiences that are personally and individually compiled with the goal of being completed or accomplished within a certain timeframe (for example, a month or possibly even a lifetime).
A bucket list is not a necessary task, but it can be a motivating and inspiring tool that feeds your creativity and drives your ambition. The beginning of a new year is an ideal time to set goals, whether personal or professional OR relational or individual. The list can be added to at your leisure, or you can make a commitment to add items with a deadline in mind. Whatever the case, have fun with it. Creating a bucket list is not meant to be a chore, but a way to establish a working guide for yourself.
Now that we’ve got a better understanding of the goal of a bucket list, review the list below for several ideas that may get you started. These ideas are in no particular order, just consider adding them one-by-one into your schedule, your routine, your bucket list! No pressure to add them all, just pick out those that catch your interest. I’d love to hear feedback on how they work for you.
Try preparing one new recipe each week
Read a new book (try a pick from the New York Times Best Sellers List)
Visit a museum
Start a blog, vlog, or podcast sharing your thoughts and opinions (The Body Quarry Blog — The Body Quarry)
Take a cooking class (invite a friend)
Run or walk a 5k
Have fun with your exercise routine (try something new and/or invite a friend)
Make (or purchase) a journal to document your thoughts and gratitude
Bake a cake or cookies from scratch
Begin daily walking routine (start with 20 minutes)
Clean out your closet and donate your items
Treat yourself to a manicure and/or pedicure
Take a surfing lesson (I’d better learn to swim before I do this one!)
Organize/volunteer at a community charitable event
Focus on getting more sleep
Take up a fun and creative new hobby (crocheting, scrapbooking, gardening, woodworking, etc)
Pick a day to stay cozy at home in your pajamas ALL day (I try to do this once every couple of months)
Remove negative things or people or thoughts from your life
Try a new type of workout or hire a personal trainer (The Body Quarry's Customized Service Packages — The Body Quarry)
Find a job you love
Find something you love about your current job
Start a garden (one plant at a time)
Learn a new language (at least a few helpful phrases)
Adopt a pet from a local shelter
Take a self-defense course
Donate blood at your local donation center (you might help save a life)
Make a plan to decrease your debt
Go for a ride in a hot air balloon
Run a marathon (or at least begin training)
Incorporate a new vegetable into your meal plan
These are a few items to help start your bucket list or add to your existing one! Remember, don’t treat this activity as a chore… instead, it should be a fun and creative way to help us think “outside of the box” and expand/enhance your life’s experiences. Try to be as detailed as possible with your selections, that way they can easily become more real once planning actually begins. I’d love to hear your thoughts and any additional ideas you may be adding to your bucket list!
Ways to Stay Motivated During the End of the Year
As the year comes to an end, it is not unusual to feel discouraged, un-motivated, or even a bit down. I truly hope that one or all of the activities shared here will serve as a guide to keep you focused with your goals and your mindset.
“If you are working on something that you really care about, you don’t have to be pushed. The vision pulls you.”
The year is coming to an end, and maybe you’ve hit a slump… Perhaps, you’ve already achieved the goals you set for yourself this year and feel like just coastin’ on through the remaining 44 days of 2022. OR, it could be just the opposite, you’ve missed the mark and don’t have the energy (nor interest) to step it up for completion of your goals!
I, myself, seem to be experiencing a blend of both mindsets. While I’ve hit most of the targets I set for myself in 2022, there is a pull for me to just ‘chill out’ and relax until January… and that is quite unusual for me. Maybe it’s because this year has been so FULL of activities with my high schooler, my middle schooler, my business, my Girl Scout troop, family experiences, and navigating my own changing health as I get older! And actually, that last item should be enough for me to realize I mustn’t stop but instead keep right on going! Time waits for no man, so if we want to live our best (and healthiest!) lives, we had better stay focused on the tasks at hand!
Let’s jump right in on ways we can make this happen and end our year feeling victorious!!
Acknowledge your successes:
One of the mistakes or missteps we often make is not acknowledging how far we’ve come or just how much we’ve accomplished. Let’s take the time to do that this year. Grab your phone, or pen and paper, and write down just how awesome you are! Really, do this! This activity alone can be a refreshing review of your accomplishments over the past year and serve as a reminder that you are capable. What’s a few more days in the year? Well, nothing but an excellent opportunity to wow your family, your boss, your clients, your peers, and even yourself!
Prioritize your responsibilities and tasks:
After you’ve taken inventory of your accomplishments, make time to prioritize what is left to be done. Prioritizing doesn’t mean that you have to absolutely finish all of your tasks, but instead, it means that you will order them in degrees of importance and necessity. Believe me, I know that some of our responsibilities and tasks are non-negotiables. I am also aware that sometimes we take on more than necessary, because we feel that we cannot say “no” or “not at this time”. If they aren’t already, those two responses are must-haves for our own peace of mind and sanity.
Once you’ve prioritized what will NEED to be done by the end of the year, set a plan in place to reasonably complete those items. Think about the big picture, but also break it down into a manageable, working, adjustable list. The key here is that your list remains a working list, as we know our lives change daily with unexpected interruptions…whether they be pleasant or not-so-pleasant interruptions! :)
Keep moving your body:
Oh my, now as a Personal Trainer, you already know how important this particular focus is to me! According to the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, Office of Disease Prevention and Health Promotion (the organization that sets the recommendation for how much physical activity we need to be healthy), “adults need at least 150 to 300 minutes of moderate-intensity aerobic activity, like brisk walking or fast dancing, each week. Adults also need muscle-strengthening activity, like lifting weights or doing push-ups, at least 2 days each week”.
And remember, while I would love to have you as my own client, you do not have to seek out a gym, personal trainer, or group fitness classes to get your exercise. Make a commitment to just start moving or move more! Your movement could be as simple as a walk around your neighborhood, taking the stairs when possible, or even parking your car farther from the store when doing your shopping. Keeping focus on physical activity will not only benefit your health, but it can also give you a great release from your daily routine and even all of the busy-ness and (often) stress we can face during this time of the year.
Allow yourself rest & care:
Y’all! The end of the year, and all of its potential for gatherings with family, friends, food, and drinks can be very fulfilling; however, it can also add to your list of responsibilities and tasks! So, we’ve got to allow ourselves to get adequate rest, while still getting care and finding enjoyment in that care. The amount of sleep that we need is truly individual, but www.sleepfoundation.org recommends 7-9 hours for adults aged 26-64. I have found my sweet sleep spot to be between 6.5-7 hours. I know that it sounds very specific, but I’ve worked very hard to determine that time frame! :) It makes a world of difference each morning when I’ve gotten the right amount of sleep for my body and mind.
When it comes to caring for yourself in an enjoyable manner, those specifics are up to you as well. However, I recommend choosing activities that are simple but bring you great joy. Think of things like catching up on a good book or new music, finding a great new candle, enjoying a new recipe, or even just a long shower or bath. Personally, when I engage in care-filled, joyful acts for myself, I wish to be alone, but you may prefer to find ways to spend time with a spouse, best friend, or any other person special to you.
Reward yourself:
Finally, consider rewarding yourself at the end of this year! This doesn’t have to be anything elaborate or expensive…. then again, if you can do that, why not?! :) Only you know what may feel like a reward for you making a plan, sticking to it, and finishing out the year strong!!!
